Interesting Commentary

If you tend to gravitate toward what is negative in life rather than what is positive, begin praying: ‘Even though I clutch my blanket and growl when the alarm goes off, thank You Lord that I can hear; there are many who are deaf. Even though I close my eyes as long as possible against the morning light, thank You Lord that I can see; there are many who are blind. Even though I put off the effort to rise, thank You Lord that I have the strength to get up; there are many who are bedridden. Even though the first hour of my day is hectic when socks are lost, toast is burned and tempers are short, thank You Lord for my family; there are many who are all alone. Even though our breakfast table never looks like the pictures in the magazines and the menu at times is unbalanced, thank You Lord for the food we have; there are many who are hungry. Even though my job is sometimes monotonous, thank You for the opportunity to work; there are many who are unemployed. Even though I complain from time to time and wish my circumstances were different, thank You for the gift of life; there are people in the graveyard who would gladly change places with me. Even though I make mistakes, stumble and fall, thank You for the grace to get up again; there are many who did not make it. Thank You Lord for all these blessings – and 101 others that I have taken for granted. Amen.'

The highest point of philosophy is to be both wise and simple; this is the angelic life.
--John ChrysoStom (c347-407)

It is a matter to gain the affection of a cat. He is a philosophical animal, tenacious of his own habits, fond of order and neatness, and disinclined to extravagant sentiment. He will be your friend, if he finds you worthy of friendship, but not your slave.
--Theophile Gautier

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs.
--Aldous Leonard Huxley British writer

¨ Fuzzy project objectives are used to avoid the embarrassment of estimating the corresponding costs.

¨ A carelessly planned project takes three times longer to complete than expected; a carefully planned project takes only twice as long.

¨ Project teams detest weekly progress reporting because it so vividly manifests their lack of progress.

Somewhere, right now, the sun is shining brightly. Somewhere, a new life is just beginning. Somewhere, the power of love is triumphing over adversity. Somewhere, at this very moment, a thousand thousand children are laughing.

Somewhere, someone who will never seek or receive credit for it is moving the world positively and powerfully forward. Somewhere, it is going on now.

If you could suddenly see all the good, valuable, positive things happening this very moment, the sight would surely overwhelm you. And yet it goes on, day after day, without fail.

For every disappointment, for every challenge, somewhere, somehow there is a way beyond it. Know without a doubt that it's there, and you're already moving toward it.

Somewhere there's a bright and shining place where you know you belong. With faith, courage, commitment and persistence you'll surely see yourself there.

The Folded Napkin...A Truckers Story If this doesn't light your fire...your wood is wet!

I try not to be biased, but I had my doubts about hiring Stevie. His placement counselor assured me that he would be a good, reliable busboy. But I had never had a mentally handicapped employee and wasn't sure I wanted one. I wasn't sure how my customers would react to Stevie.

He was short, a little dumpy with the smooth facial features and thick-tongued speech of Downs Syndrome. I wasn't worried about most of my trucker customers because truckers don't generally care who buses tables as long as the meatloaf platter is good and the pies are homemade.

The four-wheeler drivers were the ones who concerned me; the mouthy college kids traveling to school; the yuppie snobs who secretly polish their silverware with their napkins for fear of catching some dreaded "truck stop germ" the pairs of white-shirted business men on expense accounts who think every truck stop waitress wants to be flirted with. I knew those people would be uncomfortable around Stevie so I closely watched him for the first few weeks.

I shouldn't have worried. After the first week, Stevie had my staff wrapped around his stubby little finger, and within a month my truck regulars had adopted him as their official truck stop mascot.

After that, I really didn't care what the rest of the customers thought of him. He was like a 21-year-old in blue jeans and Nikes, eager to laugh and eager to please, but fierce in his attention to

his duties. Every salt and pepper shaker was exactly in its place, not a bread crumb or coffee spill was visible when Stevie got done with the table. Our only problem was persuading him to wait to clean a table until after the customers were finished. He would hover in the background, shifting his weight from one foot to the other, scanning the dining room until a table was empty. Then he would scurry to the empty table and carefully bus dishes and glasses onto his cart and meticulously wipe the table up with a practiced flourish of his rag.

If he thought a customer was watching, his brow would pucker with added concentration. He took pride in doing his job exactly right, and you had to love how hard he tried to please each and every person he met. Over time, we learned that he lived with his mother, a widow who was disabled after repeated surgeries for cancer. They lived on their Social Security benefits in public housing two miles from the truck stop. Their social worker, who stopped to check on him every so often,

admitted they had fallen between the cracks. Money was tight, and what I paid him was probably the difference between them being able to live together and Stevie being sent to a group home. That's why the restaurant was a gloomy place that morning last August, the first morning in three years that Stevie missed work.

He was at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester getting a new valve or something put in his heart. His social worker said that people with Downs Syndrome often have heart problems at an early age so this wasn't unexpected, and there was a good chance he would come through the surgery in good shape and be back at work in a few months.

when word came that he was out of surgery, in recovery, and doing fine. Frannie, the head waitress, let out a war hoop and did a little dance in the aisle when she heard the good news.

Belle Ringer, one of our regular trucker customers, stared at the sight of this 50-year-old grandmother of four doing a victory shimmy beside his table.

"I was wondering where he was. I had a new joke to tell him. What was the surgery about?"

Frannie quickly told Belle Ringer and the other two drivers sitting at his booth about Stevie's surgery, then sighed: "Yeah, I'm glad he is going to be OK," she said. "But I don't know how he and his Mom are going to handle all the bills. From what I hear, they're barely getting by as it is." Belle Ringer nodded thoughtfully, and Frannie hurried off to wait on the rest of her tables. Since I hadn't had time to round up a busboy to replace Stevie and really didn't want to replace him, the girls were busing their own tables that day until we decided what to do.

After the morning rush, Frannie walked into my office. She had a couple of paper napkins in her hand and a funny look on her face.

"I didn't get that table where Belle Ringer and his friends were sitting cleared off after they left, and Pony Pete and Tony Tipper

were sitting there when I got back to clean it off," she said. "This was folded and tucked under a coffee cup."

She handed the napkin to me, and three $20 bills fell onto my desk when I opened it. On the outside, in big, bold letters, was printed "Something For Stevie".

"Pony Pete asked me what that was all about," she said, "so I told him about Stevie and his Mom and everything, and Pete looked at Tony and Tony looked at Pete, and they ended up giving me this." She handed me another paper napkin that had "Something For Stevie" scrawled on its outside. Two $50 bills were tucked within its folds. Frannie looked at me with wet, shiny eyes, shook her head and said simply: "truckers."

That was three months ago. Today is Thanksgiving, the first day Stevie is supposed to be back to work.

His placement worker said he's been counting the days until the doctor said he could work, and it didn't matter at all that it was a holiday. He called 10 times in the past week, making sure we knew he was coming, fearful that we had forgotten him or that his job was in jeopardy. I arranged to have his mother bring him to work. I then met them in the parking lot and invited them both to celebrate his day

Stevie was thinner and paler, but couldn't stop grinning as he pushed through the doors and headed for the back room where his apron and busing cart were waiting.

"Hold up there, Stevie, not so fast," I said. I took him and his mother by their arms. "Work can wait for a minute. To celebrate you coming back, breakfast for you and your mother is on me!" I led them toward a large corner booth at the rear of the room.

I could feel and hear the rest of the staff following behind as we marched through the dining room. Glancing over my shoulder, I saw

booth after booth of grinning truckers empty and join the procession. We stopped in front of the big table. Its surface was covered with coffee cups, saucers and dinner plates, all sitting slightly crooked on dozens of folded paper napkins. "First thing you have to do, Stevie, is clean up this mess," I said. I tried to sound stern.

Stevie looked at me, and then at his mother, then pulled out one of the napkins. It had "Something for Stevie" printed on the outside. As he picked it up, two $10 bills fell onto the table. Stevie stared at the money, then at all the napkins peeking from beneath the tableware, each with his name printed or scrawled on it. I turned to his mother. "There's more than $10,000 in cash and checks on that table, all from truckers and trucking companies that heard about your problems. "Happy Thanksgiving."

Well, it got real noisy about that time, with everybody hollering and shouting, and there were a few tears, as well.

But you know what's funny? While everybody else was busy shaking hands and hugging each other, Stevie, with a big, big smile on his

At this point, you can bury this inspirational message or forward it fulfilling the need!

Well.. Don't just sit there! Send this story on! Keep it going, this is a good one!

Drivin' Ms Daisy? Not!
Billy Graham was returning to Charlotte after a
speaking engagement and when his plane arrived there
was a limousine there to transport him to his home.

As he prepared to get into the limo, he stopped and
spoke to the driver. "You know" he said, "I am 87 years
old and I have never driven a limousine. Would you mind
if I drove it for a while?"

The driver said, "No problem. Have at it."

Billy gets into the driver's seat and they head off
down the highway. A short distance away sat a rookie
State Trooper operating his first speed trap.

The long black limo went by him doing 70 in a 55 mph
zone. The trooper pulled out and easily caught the
limo and got out of his patrol car to begin the procedure.

The young trooper walked up to the driver's door and
when the glass was rolled down he was surprised to see
who was driving.

He immediately excused himself and went back to his
car and called his supervisor.

He told the supervisor, "I know we are supposed to
enforce the law but I also know that important people
are given certain courtesies. I need to know what I
should do because I have stopped a very important
person."

The supervisor asked, "Is it the governor?"

The young trooper said, "No, he's more important than
that." The supervisor said, "Oh, so it's the president."

The young trooper said, "No, he's even more important
than that." The supervisor finally asked, "Well then, who
is it?"

The young trooper said, "I think its Jesus because
he's got Billy Graham for a chauffeur!

The great tragedy of science -- the slaying of a beautiful hypothesis by an ugly fact.
--Thomas Huxley

¨ The most powerful force in the world is that of a disc straining to land under a car, just beyond reach. (The technical term for this force is "car suck".)

¨ The higher the quality of a catch or the comment it receives, the greater the probability of a crummy return throw. ("Good catch. . . Bad throw.")

¨ One must never precede any maneuver by a comment more predictive than, "Watch this!" (Keep 'em guessing.)

¨ The higher the costs of hitting any object, the greater the certainty it will be struck. (Remember: The disk is positive; cops and old ladies are clearly negative.)

¨ The greatest single aid to distance is for the disc to be going in a direction you did not want. (Wrong way = long way.)

¨ The most powerful hex words in the sport are: "I really have this down -- watch." (Know it? Blow it!)

¨ In any crowd of spectators at least one will suggest that razor blades could be attached to the disc. ("You could maim and kill with that thing.")

¨ The greater your need to make a good catch, the greater the probability your partner will deliver his worst throw. (If you can't touch it, you can't trick it.)

¨ The single most difficult move with a disc is to put it down. ("Just one more!")

Joy is your natural state of being, and yet you cover it up with fear, insecurity, doubt, negativity and strife. Give up the fear, let go of the doubt, surrender the insecurity and the joy will surely emerge.

Joy is not something that can or must be pursued. True and abiding joy needs only to be accepted, allowed and experienced. It is already there and always will be waiting. It has nothing to do with circumstances or events, and everything to do with how you look at yourself and your life.

Joy cannot be purchased and it cannot be earned. It is there for you to live and experience. Joy cannot be manufactured or hoarded, or kept away from you by anyone else. Let go of those negative, destructive things and thoughts and habits that keep it hidden. Let go, and let joy emerge.

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 . I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3 , Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5 , and Racing 3.6.

I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0 . Please help!

Thanks,
Troubled User.....

_____________________________________
REPLY:
Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 , thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING !!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0 . It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony/Child Support . I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:APOLOGIZE! because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance . Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0 , Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2 .

However, be very careful how you use these programs . Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 . Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system!

Best of luck,

Tech Support

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.The
phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde
Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the
olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit
pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a
porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by
istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can
raed tihs psas it on !!

ADULT SEX QUIZ

I DIDN'T WANT TO RISK NOT SENDING THIS AS YOU WILL SEE AT THE BOTTOM!!

Q.) What doesn't belong in this list: Meat, Eggs, Wife, and Blowjob?

A.) Blowjob: You can beat your meat, eggs or wife, but you can't beat a blowjob.

Q.) Why does a penis have a hole in the end?

A.) So men can be open minded.

Q.) What's the speed limit of sex?

A.) 68 because at 69 you have to turn around.

Q.) What does a Rubix cube and a penis have in common?

A.) The longer you play with them, the harder they get.

Q.) What's the difference between your paycheck and your dick?

A.) You don't have to beg your wife to blow your paycheck!

Q.) Three words to ruin a man's ego...

A.) "Is it in?"

Q.) What do you get when you cross Raggedy Ann and the Pillsbury Dough Boy?

A.) A red headed bitch with a yeast infection.

Q.) How can you tell when an auto mechanic just had sex?

A.) One of his fingers is clean.

Q.) What do you do with 365 used rubbers?

A.) Melt them down make a tire, and call it a Goodyear.

Q.) What does bungee jumping and hookers have in common?

A.) They both cost a hundred bucks and if the rubber breaks, you're screwed.

S how this to 3 People You Know, Or You'll Have Bad Sex for the Rest of Your Life....

This picture is taken from the wrong angle - look at the next picture for the right angle...

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED BY
Monday, Mar 13 , 2006 .

NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM.

Class 1
How to Fill Up the Ice Cube Trays --- Step by Step, with Slide Presentation
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 pm

Class 2
The Toilet Paper Roll --- Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours

Class 3
Is It Possible To Urinate Using the Technique of Lifting the Seat and
Avoiding the Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub --- Group Practice
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours

Class 4
Fundamental Differences between the Laundry Hamper and the Floor ---
Pictures and Explanatory Graphics
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks

Class 5
After Dinner Dishes --- Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples

Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours

Class 6
Loss of Identity --- Losing the Remote Control to Your Significant Other
Help Line Support and Support Groups
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

Class 7
Learning How to Find Things --- Starting With Looking In The Right Places
And Not Turning the House Upside Down While Screaming.
Open Forum
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8
Health Watch --- Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
Graphics and Audio Tapes
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours

Class 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost --- Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined.

Class 10
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
Driving Simulations
4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours

Class 11
Learning to Live --- Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife
Online Classes and role-playing
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined

Class 12
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises, Medi tation and Breathing Techniques
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM

Class 13
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy --- Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates : and Calling when you're going To Be Late.
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours

Class 14
The Stove/Oven --- What It Is and How It Is Used.
Live Demonstration.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.

Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.
Send this to all the guys that you think can stand the heat, and to all the ladies for a good laugh.

You can save a lot of money on these classes. They are all offered free of charge at the Matrimonial Center across the street.

Ruth went to her mail box and there was only one letter. She picked it up
and looked at it before opening, but then she looked at the envelope again.

There was no stamp, no postmark, only her name and address. She read the
letter:

Dear Ruth:
I`m going to be in your neighborhood Saturday afternoon and I'd like to stop
by for a visit.
Love Always, Jesus

Her hands were shaking as she placed the letter on the table. "Why would the
Lord want to visit me? I'm nobody special. I don't have anything to offer."

With that thought, Ruth remembered her empty kitchen cabinets. "Oh my
goodness, I really don't have anything to offer. I'll have to run down to
the store and buy something for dinner." She reached for her purse and
counted out its contents. Five dollars and forty cents. "Well, I can get
some bread and cold cuts, at least."

She threw on her coat and hurried out the door.

A loaf of French bread, a half-pound of sliced turkey, and a carton of
milk..leaving Ruth with grand total twelve cents to last her until Monday.
Nonetheless, she felt good as she headed home, her meager offerings tucked
under her arm.

"Hey lady, can you help us, lady?"

Ruth had been so absorbed in her dinner plans, she hadn't even noticed two
figures huddled in the alleyway. A man and a woman, both of them dressed in
little more than rags "Look lady, I ain't got a job, ya know, and my wife and I have been living
out here on the street, and, well, now it's getting cold and we're getting
kinda hungry and, well, if you could help us. Lady, we'd really appreciate
it."

Ruth looked at them both. They were dirty, they smelled bad and frankly, she was certain that they
could get some kind of work if they really wanted to.

"Sir, I'd like to help you, but I'm a poor woman myself. All I have is a few
cold cuts and some bread, and I'm having an important guest for dinner
tonight and I was planning on serving that to Him."

"Yeah, well, okay lady, I understand. Thanks anyway."

The man put his arm around the woman's shoulders, turned and headed back
into the alley.

As she watched them leave, Ruth felt a familiar twinge in her heart.

"Sir, wait!" The couple stopped and turned as she ran down the alley after
them. "Look, why don't you take this food. I'll figure out something else to
serve my guest."

She handed the man her grocery bag.

"Thank you lady. Thank you very much!"

"Yes, thank you!" It was the man's wife, and Ruth could see now that she was
shivering. "You know, I've got another coat at home. Here, why don't you
take this one." Ruth unbuttoned her jacket and slipped it over the woman's
shoulders. Then smiling, she turned and walked back to the street...without
her coat and with nothing to serve her guest.

"Thank you lady! Thank you very much!"

Ruth was chilled by the time she reached her front door, and worried too.
The Lord was coming to visit and she didn't have anything to offer Him.

She fumbled through her purse for the door key. But as she did, she noticed
another envelope in her mailbox.

"That's odd. The mailman doesn't usually come twice in one day." She took
the envelope out of the box and opened it.

Dear Ruth:
It was so good to see you again. Thank you for the lovely meal. And thank
you, too, for the beautiful coat.
Love Always Jesus

The air was still cold, but even without her coat, Ruth no longer noticed.

A mouse looked through the crack in the wall to see the farmer and his wife open

Retreating to the farmyard, the mouse proclaimed the warning. "There is a mousetrap in the house!

There is a mousetrap in the house!" The chicken clucked and scratched, raised her head and said,

"Mr. Mouse, I can tell this is a grave concern to you but it is of no consequence to me. I cannot be

The mouse turned to the pig and told him, "There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap

in the house!" The pig sympathized, but said, "I am so very sorry, Mr. Mouse, but there is nothing I

The mouse turned to the cow and said, "There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the

house!" The cow said, "Wow, Mr. Mouse. I'm sorry for you, but it's no skin off my nose."

So, the mouse returned to the house, head down and dejected, to face the farmer's mousetrap-- alone.

That very night a sound was heard throughout the house -- like the sound of a mousetrap catching its

prey. The farmer's wife rushed to see what was caught. In the darkness, she did not see it was a

The snake bit the farmer's wife. The farmer rushed her to the hospital and she returned home with a fever.

Everyone knows you treat a fever with fresh chicken soup, so the farmer took his hatchet to the farmyard

The farmer's wife did not get well; she died. So many people came for her funeral, the farmer had the cow

doesn't concern you, remember -- when one of us is threatened, we are all at risk.

We must keep an eye out for one another and make an extra effort to encourage one another.

REMEMBER: EACH OF US IS A VITAL THREAD IN ANOTHER PERSON'S TAPESTRY; OUR LIVES

You are in love with Tommy,
Because his last name is Hilfiger,
But behind closed doors, Tommy,
Is calling you a n*gger,

But you could care less,
Because you have been taught to dress to impress,
If I ask you about your true history,
You would have to look on the back of your jeans and Guess,

You come up in the club wearing Versace,
Clothes made by a homosexual male,
So even when you say you are straight,
It is very hard to tell,
And for footwear, you wear Timberlands,
Even under the sun,
That same tree that's the symbol for them,
Could have been the same one your ancestors were hung from,

I cannot forget Nautica,
When was the last memory you have of ships,
Coming to North America in shackles,
Being beaten over the back with whips,

And to my beautiful black queens,
Whose creative womb has become barren,
I am confused because your face says Nefertiti,
But your sweater reads Donna Karen,

When was the last time you saw Liz Claiborne,
Conversing with black women,
But as soon as her name is printed on a purse,
To Macy's you quickly go, running,

Ralph Lauren doesn't even look at black men,
Un! less they are driving him around town,
But as soon as that slave master appears on the back of a horse,
You put whatever you have picked up down,

My people reclaim your status in this world and in your life,
F.U.B.U. in case you didn't know, stands for ( For Us By Us ),
Buying black will someday suffice,
Do you know who owns Timberland fashion?

Well, Timberland is owned by the president of the KKK,
Surprised? Don't be.
Read more books black people,
Always hope for the best and prepare for the worst,
You may not get what you pay for,
But you'll surely pay for what you get.

~ Maya Angelou
PLEASE INFORM THIS TO ALL OF YOUR AFRICAN-AMERICAN FRIENDS SO EVERYONE WILL KNOW THE DEAL.

6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.

9. Gee, Office r! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!

12. When the Officer says "Gee .Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with,"Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"

THIS EMAIL HAS BEEN CIRCULATED BEFORE, BUT A REMINDER DOESN'T HURT, IT JUST MAY HELP.

Subject: Be on the ALERT at all times! Know what money you are carrying. This was the first I have heard of a scheme like this..... I wanted to pass it along. Be safe! This is something very serious

To pay attention to. Criminals are coming up with craftier, less threatening methods of attack, so we have to be extra cautious. Read on... I live in Alexandria , VA , but I often work in Lafayette , LA , staying with friends when I'm there. As you know from America 's Most Wanted TV program, as well as the news media, there is a serial killer in the Lafayette area. I just want to let you know about an "incident" that happened to me a few weeks ago, and could have been deadly. At first I didn't go to the police or anyone with it because I didn't realize how serious this encounter was. But since I work in a jail and I told a few people about it, it wasn't long

before I was paraded into Internal Affairs to tell them my story. It was approximately 5:15 a.m. in Opelousas , La. I had stayed with a friend there and was on my way to work. I stopped at the Exxon/Blimpie Pie station to get gas. I got $10 gas and a Diet Coke. I took into the store two $5 bills and one $1 bill (just enough to get my stuff.) As I pulled away from the store, a man approached my truck from the back side of the store (an unlit area). He was an "approachable-looking" man (clean cut, clean shaven, dressed well, etc.). He walked up to my window and knocked. Since I'm very paranoid and "always looking for the rapist or killer," I didn't open the window... I just asked what he wanted. He raised a $5 bill to my window and said, "You dropped this." Since I knew I had gone into the store with a certain amount of money, I k new I didn't drop it. When I told him it wasn't mine, he began hitting the window and door, screaming at me to open my door, and insisting that I had dropped the money! At that point, I just drove away as fast as I could. After talking to the Internal Affairs Department and describing the man I saw, and the way he escalated from calm and polite to angry and volatile....it was determined that I could have possibly encountered the serial killer myself. Up to this point, it had been unclear as to how he had gained access to his victims, since there has been no evidence of forced entry into victim's homes, cars, etc. And the fact that he has been attacking in the daytime, when women are less likely to have their guard up, means he is pretty BOLD. So think about it...what gesture is nicer than returning money to someone that dropped it????? How many times would you have opened your window (or door) to get your money and say thank you.... because if the person is kind enough to return something to you, then he can't really be a threat....can he???? Please be cautious! This might not have been the serial killer... but anyone that gets that angry over someone not accepting money from them, can't have honorable intentions. The most important thing to note is that his reaction was NOT WHAT I EXPECTED! A total surprise! But what might have happened if I had opened my door? I shudder to think!

P.S. Ladies , really DO inform EVERYONE you know. Even if this Man wasn't a serial killer, he looked nice, he seemed polite, he was apparently doing an act of kindness, but HE WAS NOT A NICE PERSON!!! Men inform all the women in your life. What you do today is important because you are exchanging a day of your life for it. Make it a good one!

Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance