Pull your pants up

The Other Day,

A friend of mine came to my dorm room just to chat while her laundry was drying. As we were chatting, two young freshmen came by. One of the boys wanted to "talk" to my friend (as in date). She asked him how old they were, and both of the boys replied 18. My friend and I both laughed hysterically because we are both 22 years old. After my friend left, the young men were still hanging around and one wanted to know how he could gain her interest.

The first thing I told him to do was to pull up his pants! He asked why, then said he like saggin' his pants. I told him to come over to my computer and spell the word saggin'. Then I told him to write the word saggin' backwards.

S-A-G-G-I-N

N-I-G-G-A-S

I told him the origin of that look was from prison. Men in prison wore their pants low when they were spoken for. The other reason their pants looked like that was because they were not allowed to have belts because prisoners were likely to try to commit suicide.

We as young black people have to be the ones to effect change. We are dying. The media has made a mockery of the Black American. Even our brothers and sisters from Africa don't take us seriously. Something as simple as pulling up your pants and standing with your head high could make the biggest difference in the world's perception of us. It is time to do right by ourselves. We need to love and embrace each other. No one is going to do it for us.

It all comes down to perception. What people perceive is what is reality to them. We have to change not only the media's perception of us, but we need to change our perception of ourselves. Remember all eyes are on you Black Man. All eyes are on you Black Woman. All eyes are on you Black Child.

People are waiting for us to mess up. We have let not only the media, but the government and the world taint the pure essence of us. They have stripped our culture down to the point where we only believe we can become rappers and athletes. We are so much more.

To all my black men:

Its time to stand up. There are billions of Black Women who want to do nothing more than worship the ground that you walk on. We are so in love with your potential. We want to have your back, we want to love, support and cherish every ounce of your being. But with that you have to show that you are willing to be the head of our households. You have to prove yourselves worthy of our submission. We need you to be hard working...Not a hustler. We need you to seek higher education, to seek spirituality. We need you to stand! And trust us; we will have your back. We know that it gets hard, we know you get weary. Trust and believe that there is nothing that a Black Woman and a Black Man can't handle with GOD on their sides.

To all my Black Women:

It is also time for us to stand up. It is time for us to stop using our bodies as our primary form of communication. It is time to be that virtuous woman that Proverbs spoke of. We can not sit by the wayside while our men are dying by the masses. We are the epitome of Black Love. It starts within us. We need to speak with conviction to let not only our Black Men know, but the world knows that we are the Mothers of this world. We are so powerful. We are so beautiful. We need to love and embrace every blessing God has given us physically, emotionally and spiritually.

For all My Black Children:

We need to love them. We need to teach them. We need to stand up for them.

We need to protect them. We need to show them that there are no "get rich quick" schemes. We need to tell them that they WILL die trying if they submit to a life of crime and deceit. We need to teach our children that no one will love them the way we can. And being a basketball player, a rapper, or a drug dealer is not reality. It's not realistic and only a small percentage of people ever make it as a rapper or professional athlete. We need to teach our children that we can be more than rappers and athletes.

We can be the owners of these sports teams; we can be the CEO's of our fortune 500 companies. We need to believe in literacy. I am almost certain if we were to look back to the 1930's and 40's, the literacy rates for Black American Children are probably still the same.

Ok...I am stepping off of my soap box now. Pull Up Your Pants!!

Everyone Can't be in Your FRONT ROW.

There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a distance.

It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go, or at least minimize

your time with draining, negative, incompatible, not-going-anywhere

relationships, friendships, fellowships and family!

Everyone Can't be in Your FRONT ROW.

Observe the relationships around you. Pay attention to: Which ones

lift and which ones lean? Which ones encourage and which ones discourage?

Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are just going

downhill? When you leave certain people, do you feel better or feel worse?

Which ones always have drama or do n't really understand, know and

appreciate you and the gift that lies within you?

Everyone Can't be in Your FRONT ROW.

The more you seek God and the things of God, the more you seek

quality, the more you seek not just the hand of God but the face of God,

the more you seek things honorable, the more you seek growth, peace of

mind, love and truth around you, the easier it will become for you to

decide who gets to sit in the FRONT ROW and who should be moved to the

balcony of your life.

Everyone Can't be in Your FRONT ROW.

You cannot change the people around you...but you can change the people

you are around!

Ask God for wisdom and discernment and choose wisely the people who

sit in the FRONT ROW of your life. Remember that FRONT ROW seats are for special and deserving people and those who sit in your FRONT ROW should be chosen carefully.

Everyone Can't be in Your FRONT ROW.

Our first place winner will have some help getting to his next funeral on time with his new grand prize:

I am a funeral director, the law does not bother a hearse on the highway at any speed. But this one time I had a time to be at an out of town crematory, and I was in a van, taking an unembalmed body to be cremated and he got me at 90 mph on the Interstate, when he stopped me and asked what was my hurry, I said, 'Brother, I have to be at a crematory in an hour or I'll miss my appointment time and they will be closing for the weekend.' He said, 'So....' I said, 'Take a whiff in the back, he stuck he head in the side window and jerked it back out and said sir hurry along and be careful.'"

Second place -- and the XM2GO -- goes to entrant that proves that it pays to know a cop…intimately:

"I was driving along one day minding what I thought was my own business, and kind of daydreaming. I must have gone a little faster than I should have and was pulled over and stopped by a state police officer. My husband is a former police officer and told me how he always let someone go if they could tell him a reason for speeding that he hadn't heard before. I knew I had to think quick because he was now approaching my door. He advised me that the reason he was stopping me was I had exceeded the posted limit by 15 miles over. I looked him in the eye and asked him sternly "Do you have any idea what I did to the last cop who stopped me for speeding?" He looked a little shocked and began feeling more cautious. I said, "I married him." I believe he is still laughing, he just walked away and said slow down, have a nice day. I was so pleased that for once my husband told me something that would really work."

Third place -- and another XM2GO -- to a hard-working officer experiencing a case of mistaken identity:

"Vehicle pulled over for speeding at approximately 04:00. When approaching the vehicle the driver asked me if I knew Officer Westberg. I told him I did. He then went on to tell me how he was Officer Westberg's buddy, and he (Westberg) wouldn't be happy knowing I was giving one of his friends a ticket. I asked him how well he knew Westberg. He said that they have been close friends for years, and even showed me Westberg's business card. I told the driver to wait in his car, and I would check to make sure his license was valid. It was, so I wrote him the ticket for speed. When I gave him the ticket, he asked me why I didn't let him off with a warning, since he was Westberg's friend. I told him Westberg doesn't have any friends and that he should look at the name of the officer on the ticket. There neatly printed was WESTBERG. The driver stared at the officer's name on the ticket for probably 15 seconds, then looked at my nametag, and saw it spelled out Officer Westberg. He told me that a buddy of his always dropped officer's names, and since he had received my business card in the past during some type of event, he thought it was worth a try. He paid the ticket."

We'd also like to honor some great runners-up. This entrant also experienced a case of mistaken identity when an officer tried to write up the passenger:

"We were going to a Sports Car Race in a MG TC on a rainy night when we were stopped for going a little to fast. The officer approached the left side of the car and asked for my driver's license and disappeared into the wet dark night. A few minutes later he came back and slipped me a ticket through the flap on the removable side weather shield. I said, "Officer, I am not the driver of the car." With that he shined his flashlight through the front window and saw my friend sitting behind the right side steering wheel. I stuck the ticket through the flap and he took it. Disappearing into the rain we saw him drive away soon afterward."

When we last went to court hoping to beat a speeding ticket, our spousal unit kindly suggested, "You don't have a prayer." Perhaps, but this reader seems to have a direct pipeline to the appeals judge in the sky:

"My sister in law was pulled over one day for speeding and she said to the passenger with her "O dear God don't let him give me a ticket" the officer came up to her and as he was looking over her driver's license the call came over the radio that the church down the road was on fire. He jumped in his car and told her it was her lucky day. My sister in law said "God you did not have to go to that extreme."

And finally, from his entry, we can't tell whether this excuse got the reader out of a ticket, but you have to admire anyone who would simply tell an officer, "Time is money."

If I'm ever stopped for speeding myself I'll try that excuse.

Below are additional submissions that did not make the final cut:

Kids speak out
"Officer," my seven-year-old daughter said, "you cannot give my dad a ticket for taking a left-hand turn in a no-left-turn intersection because me and my Dad cannot live here on the side of the road."

I said, "Sir, the sign must have been changed today, I was driving up a hill, into a 6 p.m. blaring sunset (which was true). I was blinded and made the turn as I did over the last seven years."

"Take it to court," he said.

I did. Several people were in line that day to see the judge. I explained my story and got off. Everyone behind me said one word: DITTO. We were all let off this left-hand turn error that happened one evening to all of us.

Chauvinist pig
As I was driving out of the local mall, I made a left turn and headed toward the highway. I suddenly realized I was being followed by a police car with flashing lights. I couldn't figure out why. I had done nothing illegal. (I thought.) However, I pulled over, hoping he wasn't after me, but he was.

He asked for the usual: license, registration and insurance, which I handed over. I sat and waited patiently wondering what was going on. I suppose the look on my face said it all because he asked, "Do you know why you were pulled over?"

I answered, "No."

He informed me that I made a left turn and that was an illegal turn. I became so angry that before I realized what I was saying, I blurted out, "Well, why don't you ever pull my husband over? He makes that turn every time we come to this mall. What are you, a chauvinist or something?" He stared for awhile and then roared with laughter as he said, "Well, go home and tell your husband he's been lucky and not to make that turn again."

He let me go.

Blonds get off more
My wife - a fairly quiet and reserved but very pretty blonde woman - was pulled over by a Washington State Patrol office for driving 75 mph in a 55-mph zone.

When the office walked to her car and asked her why she was speeding, she told the patrolman that she was married to a police officer who had told her that as long as she was traveling with the flow of traffic she would not be pulled over and would be okay.

The patrolman, having heard all the excuses, or so he thought, told my wife that there were no other cars within a quarter-mile of her when he clocked her on the radar.

She looked at him and told him she knew that, but that the group of cars she had been traveling with got boring so she was trying to catch up with the group in front of her.

Apparently this was a new one to the patrolman, she said he giggled a little bit, told her to slow down, drive safely, and have a nice day. She says she could see him laughing and shaking his head as he walked back to his car.

Shop 'till you drop
The vehicle was packed with four ladies destined for a daylong shopping trip. I was driving and we were cruising right along when I was stopped by a police officer for speeding. I rolled down my window as he walked up beside the car and asked the inevitable question.

"Do you know how fast you were going?"

I really didn't so I answered, "No, officer, I don't. But I'm sure I was moving right along because I was just trying to keep up with my mouth."

He bent down and looked at the car full of women, laughed, and just told me to slow down. I can't believe that my quick comment worked, but it did. No ticket that day - which meant more money for shopping!

Talk About It

TWO FRIENDS WERE WALKING
THROUGH THE DESERT
DURING SOME POINT OF THE
JOURNEY THEY HAD AN
ARGUMENT AND ONE FRIEND
SLAPPED THE OTHER ONE
IN THE FACE.

THE ONE WHO GOT SLAPPED
WAS HURT, BUT WITHOUT
SAYING ANYT! HING,
WROTE IN THE SAND:

TODAY MY BEST FRIEND
SLAPPED ME IN THE FACE .

THEY KEPT ON WALKING,
UNTIL THEY FOUND AN OASIS,
WHERE THEY DECIDED
TO TAKE A  BATH .

THE ONE WHO HAD BEEN
SLAPPED GOT STUCK IN THE
MIRE AND STARTED DROWNING,
BUT THE FRIEND SAVED HIM.

AFTER HE RECOVERED FROM
THE NEAR DROWNING,
HE WROTE ON A STONE:

TODAY MY BEST FRIEND
SAVED MY LIFE.

THE FRIEND WHO HAD SLAPPED
AND SAVED HIS BEST FRIEND
ASKED HIM, "AFTER I HURT YOU,
YOU WROTE IN THE SAND AND NOW,
YOU WRITE ON A STONE, WHY?"

THE OTHER FRIEND REPLIED
"WHEN SOMEONE HURTS US
WE SHOULD WRITE IT DOWN
IN SAND WHERE WINDS OF
FORGIVENESS CAN ERASE IT AWAY.
BUT, WHEN SOMEONE DOES
SOMETHING GOOD FOR US,
WE MUST ENGRAVE IT IN STONE
WHERE NO WIND
CAN EVER ERASE IT."

LEARN TO WRITE
YOUR HURTS IN
THE SAND AND TO
CARVE YOUR
BENEFITS IN STONE.

THEY SAY IT TAKES A
MINUTE TO FIND A SPECIAL
PERSON, AN HOUR TO
APPRECIATE THEM, A DAY
TO LOVE THEM, BUT THEN
AN ENTIRE LIFE
TO FORGET THEM.

SEND THIS PHRASE TO
THE PEOPLE YOU'LL NEVER
FORGET.

IF YOU DON'T
SEND IT TO ANYONE,
IT MEANS YOU'RE IN A
HURRY AND THAT YOU'VE
FORGOTTEN YOUR FRIENDS.
TAKE THE TIME TO LIVE!
 

DO NOT VALUE THE THINGS
YOU HAVE IN YOUR LIFE, BUT VALUE
WHO YOU HAVE IN YOUR LIFE

THE ONE THING CONSTANT IN THIS WORLD IS CHANGE!

It's difficult to let go of; a marriage, a child, a job, an addiction, a business, your home, the past or your dreams and goals. Letting go is sometimes necessary for growth, your sanity, peace of mind and health.

There's fine line between persistence and insistence. There's a fine line between having faith or being foolish. Letting go doesn't always mean you gave up. Sometimes life doesn't turn right --- it turns left and you must learn how to regroup or re-invent yourself, increase your faith and let go of old baggage. I can remember all too well how I used to try to hold on to people, the past and even projects and dreams. But I needed to let go. It didn't mean I gave up. I matured. I released. I grew to understand the wisdom of many teachers.

We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the life that is waiting for us. - Joseph Campbell

The hardest part of anything is the beginning, and the second hardest part is letting go when it's the end. - E. Fritz

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